Once upon a time, I was in a state of disengagement or boreout, feeling a lack of challenge or clarity, especially after experiencing frequent organizational changes, scope reductions, and leadership churn. This mindset was a real hurdle when preparing for crucial meeting with the new senior executives. In this post, I will talk about how I worked on changing my mindset before approaching high-level conversations.

I didn’t want to enter the room to “air grievances” or “set the record straight” about past frustrations. The real goal was to shift from venting problems to executive storytelling, ensuring I was seen as a trusted, constructive leader.

The Crucial Shift: From Grievance to Governance

To pivot my thinking and preparation, I focused on demonstrating executive presence by making these key adjustments:

1. Reframe the Message for Impact: Structured the narratives around What, So What, Now What. This means moving from simple facts to their organizational impact, and finally to a constructive, actionable path forward.
2. Anchor in Credibility: Subtly reminded the executive of my past achievements, scope, and results (e.g., leading large organizations, driving significant revenue), but avoided turning the conversation into a résumé recitation. The focus was on how my past success informed my current insights.
3. Speaking Not as a Petitioner: My goal was to offer insights on misalignment, product risks, and cultural gaps. Signalled that I was prepared to offer solutions, not just point out problems.
4. Craft One Clear Ask: Instead of presenting a laundry list of issues, I focused on a single, impactful, and actionable request. For example, asking for a documented decision log on critical handoffs so my team could execute with clarity. A single, clear ask is more likely to be remembered and acted upon.

A Simple Tool for Discipline

I prepared a single-slide visual to keep my narrative disciplined and focused. This included:

• My current role and unique perspective.
• The systemic challenges I observed.
• I offered to help fix alignment or risk areas.
• A single, clear ask.

Key Takeaways for High-Stakes Conversations

A structured, prepared approach can fundamentally change the outcome of the meeting. Here are the core lessons to adopt:

• Preparation changes everything: A structured narrative transforms you from someone who might vent into someone who comes across as a thoughtful peer.
• Leaders value signals: Executives often lack ground-level visibility. They value leaders who surface critical insights about product gaps, model risks, or team disengagement because these are signals they can use to make high-level decisions.
• Handle tough questions directly: If asked a challenging question (e.g., “Why do you think your scope was reduced?”), answer directly, focusing on organizational factors like leadership churn or lack of clear ownership, rather than becoming defensive.
• Engagement is a choice: By consciously shifting your approach from “complain” to “contribute,” you re-engage yourself in a meaningful and productive way.

The simple but difficult correction was this: 

I had to stop thinking like someone who wanted something, and started acting like someone who had something to offer. 

That is the heart of executive presence.

In the previous post, I wrote about LLMs as an Executive Coach. I use AI and LLMs effectively to help me elevate my executive presence. I would recommend using the custom Ethan Evan’s GPT available via ChatGPT and subscribe to Ethan Evan’s on substack.