In a world overflowing with “how-to” guides, best practices, and expert advice, it’s easy to fall into the trap of leading by the book. I take immense pride in rejecting that script. My focus has always been on leading authentically, which means not having to play a prescribed role.

I’m a firm believer in continuous learning. I read extensively, devouring content relevant to my field to stay grounded and up to date. But here’s the crucial distinction: I don’t blindly apply the lessons. Instead, I choose what is relevant to my situation and file the rest away as legacy knowledge.

Your Situation is Unique

I constantly tell my team that each situation is unique to its circumstances. What worked for one leader in one company will not, by default, work for you in your current role.

The goal of learning isn’t to create a perfect template; it’s to help you judge for yourself. It’s about building the knowledge base necessary to understand various scenarios, but ultimately, it comes down to how you choose to lead based on the specific time, situation, circumstance, and the decisions you need to make.

Over the years, this has become my true north: building confidence in decision-making and learning to trust my gut feeling. That is what experience is all about. That is what getting mature enough means.

The Power of Earned Experience

I keep coming back to a saying that perfectly encapsulates this philosophy:

Borrowed wisdom breaks under pressure because you haven’t earned it. You’re trusting someone else’s compression without knowing what created it.

When you rely on someone else’s advice, even if it’s excellent advice, you don’t know the full context, the trade-offs, or the nuanced reasons behind its success. It’s wisdom you haven’t lived.

Earning experience, on the other hand, holds up because it is rooted in your actual life. You know when it works, why it works, when to ignore it, and when to bend it, because you have lived it.

Take the knowledge, accept feedback critically, course-correct when necessary, but when it comes time to lead, let the decision flow from your authentic self and the wisdom only your experience can provide.

Where do you draw the line between learning from others and trusting your own judgment?